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Perfectspecimen
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Humour.
Campbell Brodie-
Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
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Adam Mint-
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Age : 59
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Mcqueen-
Posts : 30546
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 70
Location : England
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
A German guy approaches a prostitute. "I vish to buy zex vit you"
"OK" says the girl, "I'll charge £50 an hour".
"Ist goot, but I must varn you, I am a little kinky".
"No problem", she replies cautiously, "I can do a little kinky". So off they go to the girls flat, where the German produces four large bedsprings and a duck caller.
"I vant you to tie ze springs to each of your limbs". The girl finds this most odd, but complies, fastening the springs to her hands and knees.
"Now you vil get on your hans und knees".
She duly does this, balancing on the springs.
"You vill please blow Zis vistle as I make love to you."
She finds this odd, but figures it's harmless, and the guy is paying. The sex is fantastic. She is bounced all over the room by the energetic German, all the time honking on the duck caller. The climax is the most sensational that she has ever experienced, and it is several minutes before she has recovered the breath to say:
"That was totally amazing, what do you call that?"
(Vait for it)
"Ah", says the German, "Four-sprung duck technique!"
"OK" says the girl, "I'll charge £50 an hour".
"Ist goot, but I must varn you, I am a little kinky".
"No problem", she replies cautiously, "I can do a little kinky". So off they go to the girls flat, where the German produces four large bedsprings and a duck caller.
"I vant you to tie ze springs to each of your limbs". The girl finds this most odd, but complies, fastening the springs to her hands and knees.
"Now you vil get on your hans und knees".
She duly does this, balancing on the springs.
"You vill please blow Zis vistle as I make love to you."
She finds this odd, but figures it's harmless, and the guy is paying. The sex is fantastic. She is bounced all over the room by the energetic German, all the time honking on the duck caller. The climax is the most sensational that she has ever experienced, and it is several minutes before she has recovered the breath to say:
"That was totally amazing, what do you call that?"
(Vait for it)
"Ah", says the German, "Four-sprung duck technique!"
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Mcqueen-
- Posts : 30546
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 70
Location : England
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Yorkshire cocktail...
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Mcqueen-
- Posts : 30546
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 70
Location : England
We dont have pink straws 
Campbell Brodie and searcher like this post
Perfectspecimen-
Posts : 14451
Join date : 2011-08-15
Age : 70
Location : Cambs / Golf del Sur
Reminds me of 'Brit' parties in Tenerife. Pork pies from Iceland. Yuk. One I went to last week had Canarian potatoes so thought I would try one. Couldnt eat it, too much salt.
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
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Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Adam Mint-
- Posts : 23101
Join date : 2011-10-07
Age : 59
20/20...
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Perfectspecimen likes this post
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
searcher likes this post
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
The Soupervisor...
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
SEX AFTER DEATH
A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other if there is sex after death.
Their biggest fear was that there was no after life at all.
After a long life together, the husband was the first to die. True to his word, he made the first contact:
" Marion .... Marion "
"Is that you, Bob?"
"Yes, I've come back like we agreed."
"That's wonderful! What's it like?"
"Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast and then it's off to the golf course.
I have sex again, bathe in the warm sun and then have sex a couple of more times.
Then I have lunch (you'd be proud - lots of greens). Another romp around the golf course, then pretty much have sex the rest of the afternoon. After supper, it's back to golf course again.
Then it's more sex until late at night. I catch some much needed sleep and then the next day it starts all over again"
"Oh, Bob! Are you in Heaven?"
"No -- I'm a rabbit in Kent'.
A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other if there is sex after death.
Their biggest fear was that there was no after life at all.
After a long life together, the husband was the first to die. True to his word, he made the first contact:
" Marion .... Marion "
"Is that you, Bob?"
"Yes, I've come back like we agreed."
"That's wonderful! What's it like?"
"Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast and then it's off to the golf course.
I have sex again, bathe in the warm sun and then have sex a couple of more times.
Then I have lunch (you'd be proud - lots of greens). Another romp around the golf course, then pretty much have sex the rest of the afternoon. After supper, it's back to golf course again.
Then it's more sex until late at night. I catch some much needed sleep and then the next day it starts all over again"
"Oh, Bob! Are you in Heaven?"
"No -- I'm a rabbit in Kent'.
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
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searcher-
- Posts : 7625
Join date : 2012-09-18
Age : 80
Location : edinburgh
The penny just dropped vis a vis the soupervisor
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Mcqueen likes this post
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Mcqueen likes this post
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Mcqueen likes this post
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