I think you're the father of one of my kids.

A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says hello. He’s rather taken aback because he can’t place where he knows her from. So he says, "Do you know me?" To which she replies, "I think you’re the father of one of my kids." Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says, "My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery?" She looks into his eyes and says calmly, "No, I’m your son’s teacher."

Ann Summers is bringing out a beer flavoured vaginal cream in the hope of encouraging men to perform oral sex on women more often,,, but there are fears in could lead to minge drinking...

We really shouldn't let him post after 10:00pm...

Aw shit it's 10:53 now...

PS; what's a meridian...

Line of longitude innit...or is it latitude?

Don't come over with that attitude on me...

Longitude.

I knew that...just hedging my bets.

Runs through Peacehaven in Brighton and Grenwhich, feck off you others that take the piss out of England you all live by our Time and most speak our Language.

So it's you cun#s fault pubs have closing times...

no because of inernational timezones caused by us there is always a pub open somewhere.

So it's five o'clock somewhere...

The prime meridian used to go through Paris ( through the Sacred Cour or possibly Notre Same ) at one time. Not sure how it ended up in Greenwich. As far as I know it also runs directly through Rosslyn Chapel outside Edinburgh where it is rumoured the Holy Grail is buried. Very informative forum this

Although that Rosslyn Chapel bit could be arseways cos I based it mainly on the Da Vinci code

Do I give a shit right now.... xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Think Edinburghs way too far West Dermot. It went through, no goes through, Highams Park, Chingford where I grew up. Right near the level crossing. There was a plaque in the pavement but its probably long gone now. I remember the steam trains on that line too.    I can remember wanting to be a train driver when I was little. Should have persued it. Would be retired on a 30k pension now.....    Pilots dont get that.........

As a kid before we got on a train I had to go and speak to the driver cos I wanted to be one,,, thank feck I didn't, know a couple of guys who do,,, boring...

Think they have to have two in the cab now. Yes it must be intensely boring. Like East Midlands to Tenerife for the pilots. Another good reason to use the Holiday Airlines as opposed to Ryanair. Every now and again the crew get to go to Goa or Mexico or Caribbean and a couple of days round the pool. Keeps em keen and attentive like.

Going Manchester Belfast in a few weeks, so what have I got to look forward to...

Isle of Man.

My brother lives there.  Drop in for a cuppa

You can probably buy parachutes on ebay.......