Travelling in icy conditions...

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Four Wheel Drive



Daughter announces she and other half have purchased a Land Rover Freelander, I hold my head in my hands and ask why???

Oh, it will be handy in winter when we get a bit snow she replies, I accept they do live out in the sticks, but it’s not Siberia... OK, how’s the Freelander help you then I ask? reply, “It’s got four wheel drive”, yip I accept that, but has every other eejit stuck in front of you in their Minis etc got it, “No”...

One year of expensive repair bills and still going nowhere fast when it snowed Freelander sold (At a loss).........

Freelander, Worst 4x4 by far, What a pile of shite, number 1 Range Rover, 2 toyota landcruiser, 3 Discovery, 4 Defender,

I had a Honda 4 wheel drive! I was the only person that could drive up the hill where we were living at the time. Lovely car, wish I still had it out here, much better than the crappy thing we have now

We had a 4x4 for nearly 2 years and it never snowed once never had call to use its benefits, traded in have to say never liked it or driving it very clunky it was a brand new Suzuki Grand Vitara (her choice not mine later admitted we should have gone for the Rav4).

Mind typical a year after trading it in was last winters blizzards and the new Mondeo we had was shocking in the heavy snow we had, it had no grip on snow what so ever it floundered around like bambi.

Good old work horse land rover is what you need, get stuck winch yourself out.

Get yourself one of these...oh! and a jacket!

Front bits a bit dangerous, Ouch

Mcqueen wrote:Front bits a bit dangerous, Ouch

Did you notice it's a Citroen?

No, Didnt see that, Do now

Probably a C3 before they put the case round it.

Topdog wrote:Probably a C3 before they put the case round it.

A condom called a C3??

Ooops sorry wrong thread

Well there is a C3 up the road from me and it must have a prick inside it, way he bleeding drives.

Topdog wrote:Good old work horse land rover is what you need, get stuck winch yourself out.

Four Wheel Drive Test Drive



Although brought up in town, one side of the family came from a farming background, with one of my uncles still owning a farm, during school holidays I spent a great deal of time there, he had a son and daughter, the son worked full time on the farm, while the daughter Natalie (Nat), was the same age as me, she was an absolute tom boy, we got on great.

Arriving at the farm one holiday she was keen to show me our new toy! Off we set to the tractor shed, as per its name it housed the tractors and other bits of farm machinery, there it was, a Land Rover.

Nat gave me the guided tour, explaining every knob, button and lever, this one selects low ratio gears, this one selects four wheel drive, etc, etc, this thing can go anywhere she stated, she was very well informed for a ten year old... But then followed the warning, she was under threat of death from her father if she was found driving it, same rule applied to the tractors. We could both drive, as under supervision from her father and brother we were allowed to drive the tractors, and it was not just for fun, we would help out in the fields during harvest etc.

Occasionally when the men were working on a far out part of the farm we would sneak a drive on a tractor around the piece of land behind the farm buildings, but Nat had not had the chance to test drive the Land Rover as yet.

The piece of land I mention was about half the size of a football pitch, it had a farm track running round the perimeter with gates leading off to other parts of the farm, the area of land in the middle had a stream running through it and was a bit boggy in some parts, the only use made of the land were a dozen or so hen houses scattered here and there.

About three days in to the holiday Nat announced the coast would be clear for us to test drive the Land Rover as father and brother were going to be occupied elsewhere. Off we set taking turns at driving around and around the farm track bordering said piece of land, Nat became bored with this and decided it was time to test the Land Rovers off road capabilities, she decided we were going to drive through the stream, the stream was not that deep and could be waded through at most parts with wellies on. Turning off the farm track we descending down a gentle gradient in to the stream, then we came to a stop, wheel spin, no problem, Nat selected four wheel drive, result, four wheels spinning... She had picked the boggiest place to cross the stream, the more she tried to drive us out the deeper we sank, she gave up when the water reached door level...

We knew we were in the sh#t, her father was not the most patient of men, she would be belted, and I mean belted, fathers thick leather trouser belt off and over her arse, I’d seen him do it before when we had got in trouble, he was scary... Being a woman she came up with a plan, I should take the blame, as it was unlikely her father would belt me!!! I was not happy with this plan but agreed, (yes men are idiots where women are concerned).

We exited the Land Rover and hung around waiting for her father and brother to return, not a pleasant wait... Sure enough on they’re return the sh#t hit the fan, the air was blue, instant bollocking followed by a clout round the ear for both of us... Her father gets in the Land Rover after chasing a few hens that thought it was their new des-res, he just sunk it in further, it was not looking good, brother then reverses up a tractor, attached a chain and it was pulled out in seconds... There followed another bollocking plus another skelp round the ear, but at least Nat didn’t get belted.

Nats conclusion as we wandered off in to the distance to kick a cows arse or something, “Land Rovers are sh#te”.........

Who needs Jeremy Clarkston...........

Differentials you see, When Range Rovers came out in 1970, They were fitted with a central diff lock, a little button you pulled up at the side of the gear lever, Thus you could just have one wheel on the ground, and it would still move, Todays 4x4 's work with abs systems, A sensor on every wheel to stop you skidding when braking, It senses which wheel is spinning and locks that up and transfers the power to the wheel with the most grip, I once got stuck in the car park going to a 4x4 meeting, In Landrover, How embarrassing, Never been stuck in a RangeRover, They are the dogs wotsits,
I used to hate working on LandRovers, We had to do expedition one's for leeds university, Gaffer said they payed for his place in the LakeDistrict, I can imagine, They could breakdown taking them back, Utter Shite,

Adam your story made me laugh,I bet you have many more

Mcqueen wrote:Differentials you see, When Range Rovers came out in 1970, They were fitted with a central diff lock, a little button you pulled up at the side of the gear lever, Thus you could just have one wheel on the ground, and it would still move, Todays 4x4 's work with abs systems, A sensor on every wheel to stop you skidding when braking, It senses which wheel is spinning and locks that up and transfers the power to the wheel with the most grip, I once got stuck in the car park going to a 4x4 meeting, In Landrover, How embarrassing, Never been stuck in a RangeRover, They are the dogs wotsits,
I used to hate working on LandRovers, We had to do expedition one's for leeds university, Gaffer said they payed for his place in the LakeDistrict, I can imagine, They could breakdown taking them back, Utter Shite,

The age of Land Rover we were driving had no need for a third central diff lock as the power train to the front wheels was through a basic dog clutch arrangement within the transfer box. I accept my interpretation of events was technically incorrect in saying, “then we came to a stop, wheel spin, no problem, Nat selected four wheel drive, result, four wheels spinning...”, actually only two wheels were spinning, one on the front axle and one on the rear, due to the fact neither front or rear axles had diff lock facility.

The reason the Range Rover you mention had a central diff lock was due to the introduction of a third (central) differential which allowed continual use of the four wheel drive with the central differential eliminating transmission wind up, which if not relieved, in most cases resulted in failure of a half shaft.

But all that technical sh#t apart, the basic problem was I let a woman drive, personally I would have selected four wheel drive pre leaving the farm track prior to entering the stream, momentum plus the traction from the two axles would most likely have pulled us through the bog.

But then again, we were only ten...

Mermaid wrote:Adam your story made me laugh,I bet you have many more