So my first week i was all alone, Busy during the day but the nights could be lonely 
.
So one night i thought blox i'm off on the pull, I went up the Safari centre because you get a better class of bird,
Not holding out with the dollars i went in the Santiago super market, I got 6 bottles of Dorada and a bottle of Lambrini for the babes, Not to mention the Carrier bag with Santiago on it, If that dosent swing it nothing will,
Clean - Ney New Fat Face shirt and a nice pair of shorts Nike Air flip flops and i was ready to roll,
So i got parked on a stone bench outside a posh shop and got into my best pose, Shades on my head even though it was pitch black, And that famous movie star look, No point saying my best side because they are all the same,
Anyway it wasnt long before a gaggle of young babes was pointing and giiggling away in my direction, I was feeling pretty chuffed that i still had it and could attract a gathering, I though any moment we will be heading back to my palacial sea front pad, I slip some music on and the good times will begin;
I must admit i thought if the papps get wind of it and its front page of the Tenerife weeky i may have some explaining to do to Janet, But i didnt care, I had a Bacardi breezer early on and i was going for it,
Soon it dawned on me what the fuss was, An older member of staff was on the phone looking in my direction, She didnt look happy at all, My heart sank when i realised one of my nuts was hanging out of my shorts and the woman thought i was exposing myself on purpose, I just made my escape (Steve McQueen style) as the Policia Local came screaching round the corner, That is why i noticed in the shower that one nut was browner than the other It must have been on display all day, Bugger
.So one night i thought blox i'm off on the pull, I went up the Safari centre because you get a better class of bird,
Not holding out with the dollars i went in the Santiago super market, I got 6 bottles of Dorada and a bottle of Lambrini for the babes, Not to mention the Carrier bag with Santiago on it, If that dosent swing it nothing will,
Clean - Ney New Fat Face shirt and a nice pair of shorts Nike Air flip flops and i was ready to roll,
So i got parked on a stone bench outside a posh shop and got into my best pose, Shades on my head even though it was pitch black, And that famous movie star look, No point saying my best side because they are all the same,
Anyway it wasnt long before a gaggle of young babes was pointing and giiggling away in my direction, I was feeling pretty chuffed that i still had it and could attract a gathering, I though any moment we will be heading back to my palacial sea front pad, I slip some music on and the good times will begin;
I must admit i thought if the papps get wind of it and its front page of the Tenerife weeky i may have some explaining to do to Janet, But i didnt care, I had a Bacardi breezer early on and i was going for it,
Soon it dawned on me what the fuss was, An older member of staff was on the phone looking in my direction, She didnt look happy at all, My heart sank when i realised one of my nuts was hanging out of my shorts and the woman thought i was exposing myself on purpose, I just made my escape (Steve McQueen style) as the Policia Local came screaching round the corner, That is why i noticed in the shower that one nut was browner than the other
It must have been on display all day, Bugger
Says it spoils her dinner 
well feeling fed up i took a look at the forum. Glad i did as i have had a laugh, x
