A man walks into a bar with a roll of Tarmac under his arm and says "Pint please and one for the road" 
+3
Topdog
Campbell Brodie
Mcqueen
7 posters
Mail today
Mcqueen-
Posts : 30546
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 70
Location : England
Adam Mint-
Posts : 23101
Join date : 2011-10-07
Age : 59
searcher-
- Posts : 7625
Join date : 2012-09-18
Age : 80
Location : edinburgh
Just logged on to T.A. Tenerife, it's all Chinese to me ,it looks like the Slowboat menu
Adam Mint-
- Posts : 23101
Join date : 2011-10-07
Age : 59
Don't worry about it, she don't understand us either...
Mcqueen-
- Posts : 30546
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 70
Location : England
I never wanted to believe my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker, 
But when i got home, all the signs were there
But when i got home, all the signs were there
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Mcqueen-
- Posts : 30546
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 70
Location : England
Did you hear about the man who got sacked from the calendar factory ? All because he took a day off
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Adam Mint-
- Posts : 23101
Join date : 2011-10-07
Age : 59
He's claiming unfair dismissal, says he only done it once a year over a three year period on the 29th Feb each time...
He says people leapt to conclusions...
He says people leapt to conclusions...
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Mcqueen-
- Posts : 30546
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 70
Location : England
I've just been on a once in a life time holiday - never again 
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Campbell Brodie-
- Posts : 59106
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 69
Location : Scotland
Why are there no aspirins in the jungle?
'Cos the parrots ate 'em all...
'Cos the parrots ate 'em all...
searcher-
- Posts : 7625
Join date : 2012-09-18
Age : 80
Location : edinburgh
Used to be "why are there no asprin in Aldershot" cos the paras eat em all
Mcqueen-
- Posts : 30546
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 70
Location : England
Well i thought WTF
Topdog-
- Posts : 21262
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 65
Location : England
asked for a condom in the local chemist, woman said try booots, wtf know I am big but thats ridiculous
Mcqueen-
- Posts : 30546
Join date : 2011-08-13
Age : 70
Location : England
My sister bet me £100 i couldnt build a car out of spaghetti, you should have seen her face when i drove pasta
Adam Mint-
- Posts : 23101
Join date : 2011-10-07
Age : 59