Good Morning and Welcome to TFoF members and guests.

Evening All, Been on the sauce since 5pm. Happy hour starts at 5 and ends at 6.   Got a stool at the bar at 6.05........ What can I say????????

Wipe your arse, it's the decent thing to go...

Patsy collected me, having had 4 kids she knows how to wipe arse,  

Morning all, bit damp up here this morning...

Same here. Leaves are dropping too. Good afternoon.

Good afternoon members, well i went back to the beach for my massage and she says somebody before you and we close at 5, WTF, I said you told me to come back at 430 and here i am, she said you didnt make a reservation   I said you never asked me to, 
Sorry the fat bitch said 
So i went along to the one under TRG, Had my doubts about the place but in for a penny and all that, So i ended up with a young Bulgarian bird. told her my legs were the most important thing and to do her best.I was just layed there thinking i have a arrived and feeling all cosmopolitan and jet set like, all was going well until she asked me to turn over on to my back, so what did i do ? farted   it wasnt a lion roaring type one, more a blip like standing on a puppys foot, 
Feck me i thought   i thought i may have got away with it, because the dolphin music was just building up in to a cressendo ( getting louder ) anyway i think the ploy was to keep brushing against my groceries to arouse me then move in for the extras, but getting old is no fun, there was a time when i had what looked like a babys arm in my underwear, now it resembles a Champion N9Y spark plug without the spark, so my body seems to be letting me down farting without warning and sexual organs laying dormant in my thunder pants, not that sex was my motive. but it appears i'm acting my age,  worst thing was it cost 35 euro. I didnt sleep too well   Feck it

Mermaid's just ran to the toilet! She nearly pissed herself!

that was the best laugh I have had in a long time. The tears are falling again after reading the post Reg. Cam read it out the first time.

:rol on floor:the mental imagery!! the mental eejit! 

I aint laughing I said to her if you get reg to have a hard on you owe me fifty euro if you dont you get a sausage for life

Morningall

Morning members. Lovely day here...

Good afternoon, Bit quiet today   I had a lay in 5,40 then i remembered the clocks went back 4.40
so i had a cup of tea, mooched about for a bit and went back to bed, got up at 9,15 which really was 8,15
I noticed some germans next door so did a bit of drilling outside, saw there door open and nashed back to my apartment, saw him looking about through my periscope so i kept a low profile for a bit,
Been painting outside of the new place but it got a bit warm, so i went down to the beach bar and had a nice lunch, twat with the wind pipes turned up and ruined it so here i am at red arrow,
Finish the painting tomorrow when i get more supplies,apart from all that alls well in my camp,

Try and pop in Reg, its been a bit of a nightmare since you arrived as the weather took its toll, alot of bad roads to try and get round, so many pot holes, so many hold ups and my place was a mud swamp out the back.

Morning all. Off to Kerry in a while for a flying visit. Back tomorrow.

Good afternoon members, nowt exciting to report 

Afternoon all...

Ooh, rain in tenerife eh? We missed it. Blue sky all day. Lovely. Good evening.

Greetings from beautiful Kerry. Thought I would get out for a few pints tonight but my two youngest decided to accompany me :(

no rain

Good afternoon members, well sunny again 

Afternoon peeps...

Evening all

moaning

Afternoon members,