What are you doing today??

Pat Kelly was a great believer in dehumidifier's, he just never turned them on
He was well Irish

Did you hear about the Irishman who bought a new pair of glasses? He brought them home and showed them to the wife. "What do ya think" he said. "Lovely" she said, "now put them away or you'll wear them out looking at unimportant things"

Mcqueen wrote:Lunch time Mason is sat on the breakfast bar, I had turned away to inject myself, lexie was doing what girls do - nothing, Luke is reading my paper and Janet is making something,so 4 of us missed him falling off and landing on his head after hitting the pedal bin on the way down,
panic panic panic, Janet grabbed her bag Luke was looking for the car keys, and Lexie was screaming
Hold it i said phone 999 and sound serious, A & E is no place to go on a weekend, so by the time 999 answered Mason was making his usual noises and the women on the phone could here him and deemed it unimportant obviously, 90 minutes later no ambulance, they are pacing uup and down so i said phone again, 5 minutes later ambulance with lights flashing rolls up, the y then wasted 2 pairs of gloves and said he should be checked out at the hospital, 4 hours later doc looks at him and declared him fit, What a fecking shambles

Wife's organised to have kids photos taken by a professional photographer, I'm at work, phone goes, it's the wife in panic mode, she's opened the stair gate, got distracted by daughter, next thing she hears is bump, bump, bump, bump, bump, etc, etc, etc, sons bouncing down the stairs, only photo he got that day was a X-Ray at the hospital...

Came home for my daughters birthday she’s 26 today where has the years gone .
Lovely to have her home so we are going out for the day x

Happy birthday Z

Yeah, happy Birthday Zara from all us eejits here!

Went to pick up the 71 Range Rover that i had a carpet set made for, cost more than my first house
Feck i wasnt expecting that Nice job though 

Campbell Brodie wrote:Yeah, happy Birthday Zara from all us eejits here!

Happy birthday Zara, from the one sane person in this nuthouse!

Today I was putting on skirting boards. Now I expect walls not to be straight, but some of these took the biscuit.There was up to 10 ml gaps behind some of them. They were out both on the horizontal and vertical. This means loads more feckin nails to attach them and a lot of the corners wont fit flush. I could plane them as necessary but that is slow. Just going to fill any gaps and paint over. Still a slow process though

Newspaper scrunched in the gaps and polyfila over the top to fill the gaps...jobs a good 'un!

thats what Reg does with his cars

3rdforum wrote:Today I was putting on skirting boards. Now I expect walls not to be straight, but some of these took the biscuit.There was up to 10 ml gaps behind some of them. They were out both on the horizontal and vertical. This means loads more feckin nails to attach them and a lot of the corners wont fit flush. I could plane them as necessary but that is slow. Just going to fill any gaps and paint over. Still a slow process though

House I bought some years back people that had had it before me had a strange taste in interior decor, rooms were all painted bright different colours, purple, lime green etc,,, so decided all woods getting taken back to natural then stained and varnished, doors and door frames were stripped and sanded but decided to renew skirtings as it was gonna be a big job to strip and sand them all plus I didn't like them they were just 3" by 1" square wood, removal of skirting took off plaster in places so there was a bit patching up to do, ordered the skirting, there was hundreds of feet of the stuff, I miter joined every corner as I did not want to use fillers due the staining/varnish finish I wanted, took fecking ages to do, end result, perfect, but to be honest I recon if I'd butt joined it, filled and sanded joints, the end result wouldn't have been mich different once stained and varnished...

3rdforum wrote:thats what Reg does with his cars

Years ago a programme called thats life with Ester Rancid was investigating a Leeds dealer selling cars to America, when they landed the cars were bugger all like he said, he denied any wrong doing, she held up a Daily Mirror that came out of the sills with a date on after he had sold them and before they landed in the USA
Caught red handed, he puut his hands up and said i am just trying to make an honest living, He was a legend in Leeds after that, business was booming

Adam Mint wrote:

3rdforum wrote:Today I was putting on skirting boards. Now I expect walls not to be straight, but some of these took the biscuit.There was up to 10 ml gaps behind some of them. They were out both on the horizontal and vertical. This means loads more feckin nails to attach them and a lot of the corners wont fit flush. I could plane them as necessary but that is slow. Just going to fill any gaps and paint over. Still a slow process though

House I bought some years back people that had had it before me had a strange taste in interior decor, rooms were all painted bright different colours, purple, lime green etc,,, so decided all woods getting taken back to natural then stained and varnished, doors and door frames were stripped and sanded but decided to renew skirtings as it was gonna be a big job to strip and sand them all plus I didn't like them they were just 3" by 1" square wood, removal of skirting took off plaster in places so there was a bit patching up to do, ordered the skirting, there was hundreds of feet of the stuff, I miter joined every corner as I did not want to use fillers due the staining/varnish finish I wanted, took fecking ages to do, end result, perfect, but to be honest I recon if I'd butt joined it, filled and sanded joints, the end result wouldn't have been mich different once stained and varnished...

I'm mitering the corners as well Minty, but the wall might be 2mm off vertically, and another 2 or 3mm out horizontally, the angle wont close properly. Only way of doing it is planing one end of the cut of just filling after. To be honest, I've seen worse on houses before but feck it, I won't be beaten by it 

Mcqueen wrote:

3rdforum wrote:thats what Reg does with his cars

Years ago a programme called thats life with Ester Rancid was investigating a Leeds dealer selling cars to America, when they landed the cars were bugger all like he said, he denied any wrong doing, she held up a Daily Mirror that came out of the sills with a date on after he had sold them and before they landed in the USA
Caught red handed, he puut his hands up and said i am just trying to make an honest living, He was a legend in Leeds after that, business was booming

Cases packed ready to go , early start in the morning should be in time for sherry in Leonardos at lunchtime, then the fun starts .

Bitacora pensioner's annual meet-up...

I hope the mobility scooters are fully charged.

Campbell Brodie wrote:Bitacora pensioner's annual meet-up...

You've never spoken a truer word Cam ,We have a conga leader [Joan] who leads it using a Zimmer, followed by Bill from Barnton who is 91 this year and that is just the marathon runners 

Zara says Thankyou everyone for your birthday wishes we have had a lovely day sat chilling now x

Dentist this aft

So Monday large amounts on a carpet
Tuesday the doctors for various tasks,
Wednesday the Dentists for some more wallet relief
Thursday i was in court this morning (I kept it quiet in case i was hauled off   

Criminal damage me of all people anyway i breezed in full of confidence of being found not guilty, then i saw the cctv feck, the judge watched the footage and asked me to reconsider my plea, so we re grouped outside, brief said go for mitigating circumstances
throw yourself on the floor and start crying Bit over the top i said  so i came up with the i'm diabetic bit and some days i am  not myself  charges were cutting down cctv (twice) Judge listened to my side for the first time, Italian putting a fence across my land then pointing the cameras at my property, He then said anybody who puts fences and cameras up without consideration for others has to suffer the repercussions, case dismissed
Well feck me i went outside beaming looking for the nearest lotto shop